The Sign of the Cross
I have a confession.
I don't know how to make the sign of the cross properly.
I mean, I know how in theory, but every time I go to do it in reality I can never remember which side comes first, so then I just don't do it. I'd rather not make an ass of myself, or unwittingly expose myself as a devil worshipper or something.
You see, I grew up a Methodist, and good Methodists have no truck with such popish nonsense as making the sign of the cross. But I spend some of my time with people who are Catholic or High Anglican, and for them making the sign of the cross is as common as breathing. And not doing it at the appropriate time along with them makes me feel rude, or as though I'm making some kind of post-modern religious point at their expense. I'm not! I just get confused about which shoulder comes first. I'm not good with directions at the best of times. I didn't get my drivers license till I was 35!
It's something I'm really going to have to commit to memory. Apparently if you don't do it properly you are committing the most wicked sin, and I've got enough of those under my belt, thanks very much.
And after that I'll start on learning how to genuflect properly. Which knee?!?